Lars Falls to Coalition Forces.

Aug 05 Christine Graham  
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In the early hours of the evening, Coalition forces can be seen running into helicopters and mobile ground units, UH60 Blackhawk helicopter rotors begin to thump as beside them Apaches spin up as well. In the distance, the sound of tank fire can be heard before several birds lift and turn north fading into the setting sun.

That was the picture that this reporter saw just yesterday as coalition forces made a hard push to the north and by all accounts that push has been successful. Local coalition command in a statement recently had this to say.

“The Battle to take Lars airfield is over, now… The battle to hold it begins. We are deep within Irani Territory and while we would like to be able to turn our gaze to the East and Bandar Abbas, we know that our enemy will make us pay for the territory we have taken. Even as the good Iran people are forcefully brought back to Democracy’s bosom, we must hold so that this process can be completed, as only once they have embraced our ways will we be able to allow our corporate alliances to truly pillage this places natural wonders and ignore the thousands of years of human history buried in the sands.”

The General in question was quickly ushered off by two men from what looked like Kosh NI Cat Petrol and Gas Corporation. A Coalition Spokeswoman had the following to say.

“The General misspoke a little earlier, while we value the financial backing of many of our corporations who obviously wish to form mutual partnerships with any new Irani Regime that is voted into power, this war is one of liberation and of course to bring safety to the region. Iran has shown that it will not be deterred from its nuclear dreams and well the Big six don’t want a new player, I mean have you seen just how much Putin swings his Nuclear dick around constantly of late? Yeah… We don’t need another one of those”.

From Persia, this is Kitty Purrs a lot.

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